Letters From Soper

Dear NyQuil:

You suck.  Clean out your desk. You are fired.

Love,

Soper

Dear Mucinex:

Stop looking so smug. You suck, too.  Seriously, you and Nyquil together couldn't keep me from coughing until two a.m. last night?  The economy is really bad right now.  Did you see the latest unemployment figures?  Ten percent unemployment?  This is not a good time to be unemployed.  Think about that.

Sincerely,

Soper

Dear Robitussin:

I see you over there, trying to hide behind the box of Kleenex.  Don't think you are off the hook, buddy.  Let what happened to Nyquil be a lesson to you.  Get to work!

Even More Sternly,

Soper

Dear Immune System:

Hello?  Helloooo?  Are you in there?  Are you on vacation?  Oversleeping?  Just eating Cheetos and ignoring me?  I don't think it's possible to catch the Swine Flu three times in one month.  Let's stop trying to.  Do you think it would be too much to get up and, you know, stop letting me get sick all the time?

Yours forever,

Soper

*No laugh of the week this week, as there haven't been any.  Except for Moonpie telling me that God helped her get the toilet paper when she was out, then recanting and admiting that it wasn't really a miracle, she got it herself.   Guess we have to call the Vatican and let them down gently...

Comments

[spacemom]

I think your immune system is on vacation, that or your two virus mutation factories (children) are being very busy mutating the same virus to give you!
Feel better

[Kelly]

Moonpie cracks me up!

[Uccellina]

We're going through the same thing here. I can't take any of the good cold medicine because I'm still breastfeeding, but medicinal whiskey? Totally allowed.

[Jenn]

No matter what variation of Mucinex I get, it lasts exactly half as long as it's supposed to. Jerkface Mucinex.

[Lut C.]

Medicinal whiskey, why hadn't I thought of that?

Get well soon!

[Sue]

Mmm, medicinal whiskey. Feel better soon!

[Lisa]

NyQuil hasn't been the same since they changed the decongestant. And took out the 40% alcohol.

[Alli]

Have you thought about just removing your head?

[erica]

Have you had your iron levels (ferritin as well as the circulating iron) tested? I was constantly getting sick, and exhausted, and told my doc something was up. He tested my iron stores (ferritin) and it was a 5. Should have been 50. It's worth a shot! Also, check B12 levels.

I hope you are well soon!

[Nan]

Delsym - straight up cough medicine that really works - does one thing only, and very well. Oh, and the orange flavor tastes like the old children's chewable bayer aspirin.

Otherwise, try Alka Seltzer Plus Cold - my go to meds.

Feel better soon.